My hurt and pain started 2 weeks before my 13th birthday when I found my father laying on the floor in my parent’s bedroom unresponsive. He had suffered from a major stroke. Two days later a second stroke took his life. Six weeks after my father’s funeral my mother had already moved on to be in a relationship with a married man. She left me with my grandmother while she turned our new home into a place to entertain this married man along with several other men throughout my junior high years. My freshman year of high school my mother married a man she had been dating for 3 months. I was taken from my grandmother’s home and forced to move back in with my mother and my new step-father.
I quickly discovered that my step-father was clinically diagnosed as having an “Antisocial Personality Disorder” with psychopathic tendencies. It did not take a full week living with him for his verbal and physical abuse to start. I had to live with him for almost 4 years physically, verbally, emotionally, and boarder-line sexually abusing me. My grandmother fought to be granted custody of me the entire time, but the court kept ruling in favor of my mother and step-father.
I went to my pastor about the abuse at home and he told the entire congregation. This got back to my step-father who abused me for telling the pastor what was going on at home. Finally 2 weeks before my 18th birthday he decided he would hold me hostage in the basement until I was 18! He and my mother were calling me sick to school for days. I was given a secret cell phone by my uncle to use in case of emergencies. This cell phone was hidden in my mattress. I was able to get enough reception to text my best friend “Help Me”! She called my grandmother right away and my grandmother told her to tell the school. My high school called 241-Kids and the local police department, they came to my house and discovered what was happening and put me in emergency custody of my grandmother. I finished high school, went off to college where I graduated with a bachelor’s degree in Criminal Justice.
Ages 18-29 were very dark years for me. Because of the abandonment, betrayal, and rejection from my mother and abuse from my step-father, I turned to alcohol and looked for love in all the wrong places. I only felt alive when I was out partying with friends, getting intoxicated, and chasing after men.
I had vowed to never step foot in church again after suffering severe church hurt during my teenage years. At age 29 a friend of mine invited me to church. Going to church for the first time in 14 years was the turning point for my life. I got saved and accepted Jesus Christ as my savior. Slowly I began to build real relationships with godly people, join small groups, learn God’s love, and how to serve God. As I grew with Christ my need for love from the opposite sex started to fade because Jesus was filling that spot for me.
Layers of Freedom and Healing!
At age 32 I was introduced by a close friend to Restoring Lives International. RLI was a complete game changer for me! During my first conference I learned about the strongmen of Rejection, Unloving, and Bitterness that had taken over my life. I was freed from the bondage of abandonment, betrayal, seducing/lustful spirits, looking for love and validation from others, and unforgiveness just to name a few. During my 1st conference I was able to give my step-father the gift that he didn’t deserve — forgiveness. My second conference I was able to forgive my mother for her rejection, abandonment, and betrayal. I literally felt the chains fall off of me during both Mother and Father’s Love Ministry. Because spiritual healing is like an onion, I was able to peel back another layer during my third conference and forgive myself for the years of bad behavior.
Because of RLI I can honestly say I AM FREE! RLI has provided me with the knowledge I needed to get my soul cleaned and provided me with the tools to keep it clean. RLI also helped me grow even closer to my Father God and helped me experience the deep love he has for me. I am forever grateful for Bryn, Mike, and the RLI team for being obedient to the calling God has put on their lives. I am blessed to now be a part of the amazing and loving RLI team, community and ministry to help love people back to the life and freedom God has for them. THANK YOU RLI!
